Well. Good Morning everyone. Its 5am now. Its wierd for me to say morning cause I'm yet asleep :P Anyway, just wanted to blog about this before I sleep and later on forget :P Seriously... nothing much to blog about. So, here....a 4,000 word essay that Jaymz wrote. I know, randomness. x.X Ill read the essay and soon fall asleep :) My new bed time story :) Ok. Im going to read and sleep soon. :)
A Close Call"Welcome back class, I guess that you all have already heard." Miss Claude said standing confidently in front of the class. I always found it hard to contain my laughter whenever Miss Claude spoke to us. She looked so manly. Her voice was the deepest voice I had ever heard come out of a woman’s mouth. She was a tall lean woman. She was previously in the army, which explains her strictness. But at the age of 32 she gave up her life of adventure and danger to become a high school teacher and eventually, the head teacher.
"Mr Connery has broken both his legs and an arm over the winter holiday in a skiing accident." A few hushed giggles ran through the class room as this was said. Yes, class 10C has already heard about Mr Connery’s skiing incident, and it was very amusing.
"This is no laughing matter!" called Miss Claude. And the giggling turned into silence. "I have assigned a temporary teacher to take charge of this form until Mr Connery gets back on his feet, which might take a while. Behave, and show respect." She spoke sternly to us. The door creaked open gently causing the classes attention to focus on it. And through the door walked a young male. He wasn’t very tall and wasn’t very short, he was perfect. He had messy short black hair, shining grey eyes and peachy skin. He was casual looking, but professional at the same time. He wore black trousers with a smart navy blue shirt, leaving 5 top buttons undone. I could hear girls sighing all through the class and boys starring with envy. At that moment I knew I was in love. Actually I didn’t. I knew I liked him, he was very good looking. But every other girl in the class felt the exact same. Loads of teens got crushes on their teachers. It was nothing original, or special. But what makes it original and special is when the teacher likes you back.
"This is Mr Davis." Miss Claude introduced as he joined her in front of the class. Davis smiled a white glowing smile. "Well, you have everything you need?" Claude asked turning to him. Davis nodded calmly. "I’ll leave you to it then." She said scanning the class room one last time. The moment she left the room all heads turned to Davis. There was a long silence. All that could be heard was the creaking of chairs and the crowing of birds from outside the window.
"She’s a bit scary ain’t she?" He said cracking a smile. The boys in the class nodded and laughed. But the girls just stared admiringly. "Okay.... let’s get down to business." He said punching the palm of his hand.
"Do we have to sir?" Called Sam. He was the class clown. Or at least he thought he was. I never really found him amusing. But the boys all followed his lead regardless. "Yeah do we have to?" I heard each one call out.
"Shh...." Davis hushed silencing them. No supply had been able to do that before. He certainly had a way with the children. "Since I’m gonna be here for while why don’t I get to know you all. Just talk amongst yourselves while I come round." The whole class cheered and started shouting to each other.
"He’s gorgeous ain’t he?" said Amy turning to me. We were close friends. We had been since year eight. To be honest, I was kinda jealous of her. She was very pretty, had all the boys chasing her. Blond hair, blue eyes, busty. If I were a boy, I would chase her. But on the other hand, I was just a thin stick with straight brown hair and hazel eyes.
"What’s your name?" Davis asked Amy kneeling on the floor to get at the same level. I saw Amy blush.
"Amy sir." She answered smiling madly. "Is it alright if I call you Davis?" She asked. He laughed slightly then nodded.
"Yeah, that’s alright." He had such a lovely laugh. "What about you?" He asked turning to me.
"Claire." I answered.
"I’ve always liked that name." He said. I couldn’t help but blush. Clair was such a commonly used name. It wasn’t special. Why did he like it?
Over the past week Davis had become a big hit with the students at school, especially the boys. He would write a note for each of us to be excused from class and let us play football outside on Tuesday
mornings. I suppose he got into loads of trouble for that, but he carried on regardless. Amy managed to find out a lot about him. For example, he was only 23. He has studied child psychology and the history of art in college. He was saving up to go on an around the world trip. He was wonderful, outgoing and adventurous. But like most men, he had a downfall. He had a girlfriend. It wasn’t much of a shock; a man like him was bound to have a girlfriend. But it was still heart breaking all the same, not just for me but for every girl.
I wanted to see more of him. The only time I ever got to see him was for morning and lunch registration and Art on Thursdays for two periods (Mr Connery was also my art teacher as well as my form teacher.) But that wasn’t good enough. I was surrounded by others all the time and couldn’t have Davis to myself. But then something happened, it was fate, it had to be.
It was Monday morning registration and as usual the girls were squealing in the corner of the room and the boys were shouting at the top of there voices. But I sat quietly in at the far end of the room minding my own business, reading a book (‘Along came a Spider’ by James Patterson). After half an hour the bell rang for first lesson.
"Claire! Stay behind, I’ve been asked to talk to you!" Davis called over to me. At first it didn’t seem real. It felt like a dream. But I soon realized that I was indeed wide awake. I just nodded, dumb-found.
"Oh that is so unfair." said Amy nudging me in the shoulder.
"Yeah. Why does he want to talk to you?" asked Jenny joining in. I shrugged. All the girls surrounded me giving me envious looks. Secretly I was pleased. But I couldn’t understand why. He only wanted to talk to me after all.
I waited for the class the empty before walking over to his desk.
"What did you want to talk about?" I asked shyly.
"Well... I’ve been told by your teachers that you are not giving enough effort in class."
"What do you mean?"
"Mrs Bradshaw said you rarely listen or do any work in German. She said you just sit around day dreaming. And Mr Radshaw said the exact same thing." He told me. I didn’t know what to say. I stood still looking like a little girl being told off. "Is there anything you want to talk to me about?" He asked sounding concerned. He rested his hand gently on my shoulder. "Anything going on at home?" I shook my head. There was nothing wrong with me. I was just a day dreamer and I had a very short attention span.
"What do you want to do when you’re older?" Davis asked out of the blue.
"I’m not sure, a writer maybe."
"You like reading?" He asked. I nodded slowly.
"What do you like?"
"James Patterson." He nodded.
"I’ve read a couple of his stuff. He writes murder mysteries right? My favourite of his is ‘Jack and Jill’." He told me.
"That’s one of mine too." I said smiling. We had so much in common.
"My girlfriend Jemma likes him too." I cringed at the mention of her name. I had never met the woman but I hated her already. Davis spoke a bit more about James Patterson’s style of writing. I found it all quite interesting.
"Well..." He said. "If there is nothing wrong, I guess you should get to lesson." He rested his hand on my shoulder again. Our faces were close. So very close. The thought of kissing him shot in and out of my mind like a lightning bolt. Wait... I could kiss him. NO! I was Claire. Good, well behaved Claire. I wouldn’t do that. But if I wouldn’t... why was my face slowly edging towards his? Why were our lips millimeters apart? Just a bit further and we would be-
"Mr Davis, I need to see you about that football thing again!" shouted Miss Claude from the doorway. I quickly pulled my head away from Davis, and he did the same. Luckily, Claude hadn’t looked up from her clip board and didn’t see a thing.
"Um... yeah... um. We already have spoken." He told her.
"Yes I know but-" She looked up from her clip board. "Are you okay?" She asked him. "You just look a bit flushed."
"Flushed? No. I’m fine." He told her. I stood beside him, my cheeks red with embarrassment. "Can I talk to you in a second? I’m sort of in the middle of something." He asked looking at me with a confused and at the same time slightly angered expression.
"No. This is all the time I can give you I’m afraid." She told him while tucking her shirt properly into her masculine trousers. "Claire, get to class." She ordered me. I obeyed and scurried out of the door.
Getting out of the stuffy class room cleared my head. I couldn’t believe what had happened. I was shaking from the thought. This was not me. This was not Claire. Why had I done that? It was a spur of the moment thing. But wait... Davis hadn’t pulled away. Did he like me too? NO! He couldn’t. Not me. Besides, he had a girlfriend. So then why didn’t he stop it?
I was confused, dazed. I needed to get out. I needed to get away from the school. So I did. I left, heading towards the park. That was the place I would usually go to when I needed time to think. I could see things more clearly then. I could figure out what to do next.
"I had a call from the school!" Mum shouted as soon as I had walked through the door. "What do you think you’re playing at, I’ve spoken to you about this before?" I couldn’t be bothered to argue back. Mum and I had never seen eye to eye. And her constant drinking doesn’t help matters at all. I was also angry with her going out with men nearly every night. Sometimes she wouldn’t come back for days and I would have to run the house on my own. But luckily Amy would help me though.
"Sorry." I mumbled pathetically under my breath. Mum looked anxiously down at her watch.
"I haven’t got time for this. We will talk about it another time." She fixed her self up through the mirror in the hall way. She applied a coat of mascara to her eye lashes and bushed up her dark brown hair.
"Where are you off to?" I asked her already knowing the answer.
"I have a date."
"AGAIN!" That was the 10th date she had had that month. I was tired of it. The men she chose to go out with were no good. They only wanted her for one thing, and she gave it to them without question. As much as I hated to admit it... my mum was a slut!!!!
"Shut up and go upstairs." She ordered me. I did as she said. I knew that one day she would get really hurt by a man, and I wouldn’t be there to pick up the pieces.
I lay on my bed, running through my mind the events that had accrued earlier on that day. What had come over me? Nothing like that had ever happened to me. But the more I thought about it, the less I regretted it. I liked the danger of it all; I liked the fun, which was something I never thought I would hear myself say. But it was the truth. And that was the precise moment that I realised. I was in love... with Mr Davis.
I wanted so bad to tell someone. I wanted to scream it out at the top of my lungs. But I didn’t, I could have told Amy, but she wouldn’t keep it a secret. I had to be discrete for this to work. I didn’t want Davis to get into trouble. I had to think this through. How could I get Davis alone? Wait... I wouldn’t have to worry about that.
"Claire. Stay behind. I need to talk to you." Davis called the next day at morning registration.
"Again?" Amy asked me suspiciously. "What’s going on?" I shrugged my shoulders.
"Nothing." I told her innocently. I felt as if my whole personality was changing. It might sound stupid, but I felt wild, out of control. Amy asked me questions suspiciously for a while before she got dragged away from me by the boys .Once again I waited for the class room to empty.
"What you did yesterday was wrong." Davis told me sternly but quietly. "Do you know the amount of trouble I could get into?" he asked. I was silent. All the confidence I had felt early had been drained out of me. I looked down at my shoes and twiddled my thumbs. Once again I felt like a little school girl. NO! I was 15. I was not little. I would be 16 in a month. I had to say how I felt.
"It didn’t feel wrong." I told him so quietly he could barely hear it.
"NO. But nothing happened." He said slamming his hands on the table. I jumped slightly because of the shock. There was silence for a moment. Neither of us knew what to say.
"You were going to kiss me back." I whispered.
"Oh, is that what you think?"
"Yeah! It is." I was angry, hurt, upset. Had I read it all wrong? No. I couldn’t have. There was only one way to find out.
I lent forward and kissed him. I did it fast to make sure that no body interrupted us that time. Then we stood apart, in silence again. But to my surprise, HE lent forward this time, and kissed me back. We didn’t stop. The kiss became fiercer. I couldn’t pry my hands off him. I fell back so that I was sitting on the desk. I remember every detail. I remember the feel of his soft skin, the smell of his minty breath, the scent of his after shave. It was like magic.
"No!" He said pulling apart. "This is wrong. I have a girlfriend."
"So, I won’t tell."
"You don’t understand!" He shouted running his hands through his hair in frustration. "It’s dangerous!"
"It’s fun!"
"It’s wrong!" He told me very seriously. "You’re too young to understand."
"I am not! I know how risky this is just as much as you do!"
"Then why play these games?!"
I didn’t answer that straight away. I didn’t know what to say. What was the truth? Was it the fun? Was it the excitement? NO. I knew what it was, but should I tell him? Was it too soon?
"I love you." I said to him. He looked confused.
"No! NO! NO!" He shouted pacing around the room. "You only think you do!"
"And so what if I do? The point is... I have feelings for you." I said standing up close to him.
"And don’t you think I do! But I can’t act on them. Neither can you!"
Wow. He had feelings for me. I was happy. I was glowing. It was the best feeling I had ever felt. But he said he wouldn’t act on them. What to do? I watched him pace across the room, lost in thought.
"You’re only 15."
.................
"So, I will be 16 soon."
More pacing, more thinking.
"I could lose my job."
................
"They won’t find out."
Stopped pacing, still thinking.
"What about Jemma?"
...................
"No one has to know."
"You’re crazy." He said breaking into a confused smile. The smile disappeared after a while. He ran his fingers through his hair. "Get to class." He ordered.
"But-"
"I’m still your teacher." He said looking out of the class room door, checking that no one had witnessed what had happened.
"Okay, okay. I’m going." I told him.
What did this mean? Did it mean that he liked me back and wanted the relationship to go further? Did it mean he wanted to forget the whole thing had ever happened? I had no idea. And I had a feeling that Davis didn't either. I would just have to sit back and enjoy the show!
I was angry. Davis didn’t want to speak to me about what had happened over the last couple of days. He acted normal, completely normal during registration. But the only difference was that he didn’t speak to me at all, where as before this happened, her would have. He hadn’t even managed a smile. I felt alone and foolish. I started to regret doing anything. I was confused and couldn’t understand what I had done wrong. After all, he did say that he had feelings for me, didn’t he? I wanted to talk to someone about it. I was so very close to telling Amy. But I managed to bite my tongue. I knew I would regret it terribly in the future if I had told.
I was in a state, depressed, upset and angry. But the strange thing was... Mr Davis looked even worse than I had. He looked scruffy, like he couldn’t be bothered. He didn’t even joke around with the boys anymore, or take them to play football. I suppose that the best word to describe him was ‘tired’, both mentally and physically. I felt bad. I felt like it was my fault, which in a way it was. I had to confront him, talk to him. But I couldn’t. I too was tired. Not because of him, but because of worry, worry for my mum. She hadn’t come home since she had gone out with that man. At first I wasn’t worried. I assumed she would be back very soon. But when she didn’t return, I felt scared. This was a lot of pressure for a 15 year old girl to handle. And on top of it all, my birthday was in a week and a half. I had told Amy that I would throw a party, but I was in no mood for one. I just wanted mum back; I just wanted to speak to Davis.
"Hey, you look really down. Are you okay?" Amy asked during my maths class. I gave a meaningless nod. Amy was not stupid, she knew very well that there was indeed something wrong with me, and she also knew that when there is something wrong with me, I would not talk about it. There was no getting it out of me, so Amy didn’t even bother to ask. But this time, I so desperately wanted to talk about it. But I couldn’t, there was something stopping me.
All through the day I was getting sympathetic looks from the teachers and students. They didn’t even have to ask, they all automatically knew I had a problem. I sat silently in all my classes, not paying attention to anything being said. But in my German lesson, when a year 8 student entered the class and handed a note to my teacher, and her eyes turned to fix on me, I knew that something was seriously wrong.
"Claire, report to the head teacher’s office." I got told. I stood up without question and left. I wondered what was going on. Had Mr Davis told someone what had happened? Had someone found out?
"Sit down please." Miss Claude told me as she pointed to the chair in front of her. I did as I was told. I guessed that no one had found out about Davis and I as Claude did not sound angry when she spoke. But then again, I could be wrong.
"Your- Your mother..." she began. Right then I knew it was bad news, I had to be. What had happened to my mum? I hoped dearly that she was alright. "Your mother is in a coma." She spoke slowly. It took me a while to register what was said. It didn’t seem real at first. Once the news had set in, the tears built up in my eyes. Claude continued to speak sympathetically. "She got stabbed, and is suffering server injuries. She has got internal bleeding and there is slim chance of survival."
I couldn’t help but remember the last thing I had said to her. Never once had I told her how much I loved her, never once had I thanked her for my fortunate upbringing. I suppose you never really realize how precious something is until it’s gone, or in this case, going.
"I am willing to drive you up to see her." She told me. But I shock my head. I was in a daze. Claude gave me a puzzled look. Who wouldn’t? My mum was in hospital, close to death, and I was refusing to visit her. I couldn’t, I wouldn’t. I wasn’t ready. Something was stopping me from going. I was scared of the state she might be in if I did go. I was scared I would blame myself. I stood up and left, Claude didn’t try to stop me. I was set on going to the park and crying my eyes out, but the tears where coming at that very moment, much too soon, so instead I ran to the nearest empty class room and cried there. I felt safe, protected, hugging my knees in a small corner of the room. I wasn’t sure how long I had been there, maybe an hour, before someone had interrupted me. By then I had stopped crying, but I guessed my eyes were puffy and my cheeks were red.
It was Davis. He didn’t speak at first. He didn’t say a word. He just sat down in the corner next to me in silence. He looked at me sympathetically. But I didn’t look at him.
"I suppose that you’ve heard what happened? I know how you teachers like to gossip." I asked while wiping my eyes with my jumper sleeve. Davis nodded. I could feel the tears coming back. I couldn’t hold them in. They just fell, like a raging waterfall. Even then Davis didn’t speak. And strangely, I was grateful for that. I didn’t want to listen to anyone speak. I just wanted to cry, let it all out. And I think Davis knew that. So that’s what I did. I cried and cried as Davis wrapped his arms tightly around me.
"I know you’re afraid, but I think you should see her. You will regret it if you don’t." He told me. I was upset that he had broken the silence, so I didn’t answer. He didn’t push on the subject.
"Why do you look so scruffy?" I asked him sniffling a bit, looking down at his un-ironed shirt and odd socks. I wanted to change the subject. I didn’t want to think about my mum at that moment other wise I would just end up in tears again. Davis smiled slightly.
"I’ve been sleeping on a friend’s floor." He told me. "I’ve been kicked out my house."
"Why?" I asked softly.
"Jemma and I have broken up." He said sadly.
"Why is that?"
"You know all too well why it is." He answered. And I did know. It was because of me. "I have been teaching for quite a while now and nothing like this has ever happened before." He said looking up at me. I felt slightly ashamed, like he was accusing me of something. But that feeling soon disappeared when he kissed me so very softly.
"Let’s go." He said standing up and holding out his hand to me. "I’ll take you to see your mum." I wasn’t too sure whether I should take it. Should I? That was the moment I was given an ultimatum. If I took Davis hand, that would be it, that would seal the deal, me and him. But if I didn’t take his hand, that would also be it, me and him, apart forever. What to do? But of course, you all already know what I do. After only seconds of debating with myself, I grab his hand and hold it tight.
